Threw the story I’ve been working on up for workshop critique at our writers group website in the hope of getting some help with it. And naturally, the second I did that, even after spending most of today tweaking and rewriting, I noticed a very amateurish flaw in the writing.
It’s funny how we go back to old bad habits. This time, it was third person telling instead of showing. It was easier in first to get away with this; it comes off as opinion to some degree, and so flows more easily. But once the third person omniscient narrative voice starts telling the story, it’s more jarring and obvious. The omniscient point of view, especially with a single character involved, has so many opportunities to create a mood in setting and action. The bed sheets needn’t just be changed that morning, they can feel clean and cool instead. Yet here and in many other spots it seemed I wanted to get that part out of the way without taking the time to paint a picture and color it in to make it more inviting.
It is a storyworld, and enough care need be taken with the feel of it to let the reader linger, live in it a while
The Lost Children: A Charity Anthology
Maybe I’m misunderstanding, but 3rd person is not bad, nor is it “playing safe.” You have all kinds of opportunities that way without trying to over-clever yourself in 1st person or constant direct dialog.
I’m not a writer so I wouldn’t know, but probably most important to keep whichever P.O.V. throughout and not change it.
Not all telling is worse than showing. There are some things worth showing and others that aren’t. It’s a judicious balance, as well as leaving out what the reader can figure out fine on his own, that you have to shoot for. All showing makes for a very long piece, which is my chronic problem as a writer.
Mark, in first person pov, everything is seen through the eyes of that narrator and the reader is dependent upon him for information. In the third person, the narrator can intrude upon the story by too much telling.
Barbara, I understand what you’re saying, and exposition through telling often moves the pace along much faster than a realistic dialogue or attempt at sensory description might do. I’m hoping that my experience as a reader, learner, and writer will point out the obvious.