REALITY?: The Curtain Falls

My father-in-law died a little over an hour ago.  It is strange to be there at the very moment that life transforms into death.  I stood by his side, combing my fingers through his hair, silent.  They say the hearing is the last to go and I remember with my own mother, I talked to her; just little things, but I think she heard.  She died seconds after I promised her we’d take good care of dad.

But tonight with Frannie, it seemed so out of place because he was very hard of hearing, half reading your lips and his eyes were closed, already in a coma that came on suddenly just a little while before.  Fairly screaming out I love you, or Jimmy’s here, and asking him to wait for the others–John and his wife, who made it there in time, Diane and Marilyn who were only minutes late, and Janet who was an hour away.  It sounded crass in the silence of the room.  Jim was nervous, not knowing what to do.  Just hold his hand, I told him.  Then waiting.  The four of us watching an old man slowly leaving without moving at all.  Several times I checked his pulse, surprisingly strong for one whose breaths were so weak they were imperceptible.  Then the last time, there was no pulse at all. 

Privileged to be there at that very instant of metamorphosis, and yet so quietly a change for such a monumental step from life to death.

I’ll miss him.  I’m grateful to him for giving me his son.  I want to thank all of you who offered your wishes and prayers back in March when he was first taken ill.  He wasn’t uncomfortable all this time, the cancer spread and only caused him pain the past few days.  He left us quickly and peacefully, and I’m sure your prayers did help.