100 DAYS PROJECT: #22
Wishes of Time
This particular story is on one of my favorite subjects, the mystery of time, real time, freed from labels and restrictions placed on it by the human mind. It is also about how people use and view time, how whether they need more or want it to rush to bring them to a better place, it’s all relevant, dependent on belief and desire.
The map looks quite complicated, but a story can be gotten through quickly, though there are a couple of scenarios going on simultaneously here. The voice is a mix of formal, lyrical, and despite my best intentions, it was difficult to control. If I had time, I’d like to go back and copyedit to bring out a stronger, less insipid tone, when I am in a better frame of mind.
The Lost Children: A Charity Anthology
June 12th, 2009 at 8:19 pm
Something very interesting happening here.
June 12th, 2009 at 8:31 pm
This is one worth going through repeatedly; it is the best of what I enjoy about hypertext, how seemingly different tales merge, mingle, drift apart from each other. One confusing link, though: when I read through it the first time (straight) I followed the “hospital” thread, and suddenly I got the screen about Tamara standing at the old man’s bed. Did I jump a link? It didn’t fit until I followed the “less time” line.
Awesome views, Suse.
June 12th, 2009 at 8:53 pm
Very likely while you guys were reading this, I was in my server files changing the ending lexia from “gone” to “night” as I’d missed the last space.
Steve: Interesting how? Am I getting something right finally?
Mary Ellen: If you ran straight through, you would miss the patients until you get to the end. In most hypertexts, this ‘straight through’ is a forward arrow (or just the space itself being clicked) and that progresses story. I’m not sure, without a guard field, that I can maneuver the reader through the story without links going back to lexias read, or being dependent upon the reader’s curiosity to take some side roads first.
I read this the first time online and ended up not knowing about the old man until the end, which is okay, since we watch the child and then compare the parallel of the old man. I read it again and maneuvered through it beautifully catching each lexia in a good time sequence and covering all stories. Wish I’d written down how.
June 12th, 2009 at 9:05 pm
Actually, ME, that’s kind of an odd but interesting take on the story. It focuses only on the workings of the hospital, with bare hints at “More morphine for the old man at the end of the corridor. Go quietly into the little girl’s room” and then goes directly to the old man’s room. I like it. But do go back and read the stories of the what else is going on. Thanks for your insight on this, it helps me write.