HYPERTEXT: A Bottle of Beer – Uh-oh
After cutting about 30% of the story out, I’m wondering if I’ve possibly cut not too much, but the wrong things. I’m just not getting that warm fuzzy feeling from the story, the empathy with the character.
Maybe the imagery and language were hiding a rather blah plot beneath them. There is some depth to the story beyond the simplicity of the linear and the intricate Shards that enhance and provide balance. The protagonist of this story has been abused emotionally and physically by not just her husbands, but by the traditions of her society. She has survived. This story is one of the few I’ve written that goes beyond personal trials to be more representative of a portion of the population, and it’s certainly not a frivolous problem. But I may have lost the drama, even as I’ve attempted to focus it, by cutting some of the emotion out of it.
It could also be that I’m just sort of sick of reading it by now.
The Lost Children: A Charity Anthology